What Should I do with my Life?
From kindergarten we are asked this question - What do you want to be? We may conjure a fantasy or two, but over time these become remolded by the pressures of our peers, parents, teachers, culture and obligations of life. Endless distraction takes us away from ourselves and we loose direction. How can we come back to ourselves and move forward with clarity and confidence? Here are ten tips!
1. Book Stores
Get lost in a book store. This is a really fun and accessible way to discover yourself. Get yourself alone in a book store and just, see where you end up. Which aisle pulls you in? What books call to you? This exercise can really reveal our deep passions and hidden curiosities or simply affirm our known likes.
2. Fast
Take space. We unknowingly get so caught in our routine and fixed perspective, we too get trapped in our distractions and so I cannot emphasize enough how important taking space is. Fast from addictions, friends, school, work, or home.
3. Jealousy
We often think about jealousy as being an ugly emotion, but I think, with the right lighting it can be quite beautiful. What do I want? Who do I want to be? Where do I want to go? What do I want to have? Again these are the unanswered questions that stress us out. So what if we could get a peek at the answers? This is where jealousy comes in. Pay attention if you ever sense that ting. Observe it, feel it and THANK it.
4. Free Time
Observe yourself during pockets of free time. What do you do when time is left to you? You get off school or work, you’re looking forward to go home and then what? Note that this doesn't have to be a direct translation.
5. Childhood
Reflect back on what your answer was as a kid. When you were asked. “What do you want to be when you grow up?” What did you say? It might not be 100% relevant today, but there may be a seeds of something.
6. Perspective
Consider that maybe what you do for work doesn’t have to be your everything. I would time and time hear the advice, “Find a way to make money doing what you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.” This is a really lovely idea to aspire to, but for me it was creating too much pressure to find that perfect thing. What released the pressure and brought me a lot of peace was realizing that, what I love doing doesn’t HAVE to be what generates my income. I can still seek out a paying job that I really like and then do what I love (or what fulfills me in another way) in my spare time.
7. Time
Another way to take the pressure off is to consider that your job hasn’t been invented yet. Our world is changing at such a rapid pace that the needs and abilities of one generation may be unrecognizable to the next.
8. Listen
We often hear about listening to our inner voice, and that is SO important. It is what I hope #2 helps you do. And for a moment I also want to give attention to the outside voice. Of course I’m not encouraging you listen to every outside voice and know that they are never meant to be sole guides, but they can help reveal to us where our advantages lie.
9. Elders
Talk to successful people. Pretty much everyone that I’ve ever talked to who I saw as being happy in their lives with some combination of - success in their career, financial stability, contentment in their work etc., they have said that, it’s not a straight line. The path is not direct and you often can’t see too far ahead of you, it’s following breadcrumbs.
10. Attention
Reflect on what success means to you. For myself, what has helped relieve the pressure of figuring out exactly what my life/career path would look like, was shifting my attention — Asking “Who do I want to BE?” Rather than “What do I want to DO?” Remembering that in so many ways, Your being is your contribution. And from really being - your authentic self, your present self, your most evolved self you’ll come to find your “do” more naturally. So focus on just being a good person, growing your heart, your mind and feeding your soul.